Time2Talk reply want a baby

Dear Time2Talk

I am 16 and on my own. All my friends have boyfriends, and my mother and father don’t have time for me. I don’t feel loved.

I really like this 18 year old boy and we talk every day. He told me last night that he likes me.

We have met many times before and we are really good friends.

The problem is that I really want a baby as I want someone to love and someone who will love me back.

He has told me, after we have been together for 4 months he will give me a baby as he wants what I want. He wants to make me happy to make him happy.

My family love him and so do I.

What should I do? Am I wrong with wanting a baby? Should I want one? What shall I do? Does he really want this?

Thanks

Want a baby

Dear Want a baby

I’m sorry that you feel unloved. I know that many other teenage girls also feel that they want to have a baby so it’s normal to have these feelings. When they do become pregnant and have their baby they don’t always feel fulfilled, and instead are left to cope with the stress of being a parent.

Having a baby is not the answer. You should think this through and ask yourself the questions: ‘’what can I offer a child at this moment in time?” and “am I financially secure to bring a child into this world?’’

I know you probably hear this a lot, but you have so much more to experience before you settle down with a baby. Being a mother is a huge responsibility, you have to put your child first at all times and your life will never be your own again. There is plenty of time for you to settle down.

Your time now is to embrace every opportunity that comes your way. Live and learn, and when you do decide to settle down in the future you will be older and wiser and have so much more to teach your child. I’m not saying that you wouldn’t be a good mother, but to decide on being a parent at your age, and with a boy that you haven’t known for long, could be a bad decision.

Have you tried speaking to your parents about how you are feeling? They may not be aware that you think that they don’t have time for you. They may also think that with you being a teenager, that you want your own space. But I’m sure if they knew how you felt they would be there for you to support you through this emotional time.

What do you want to do in life? Are you in college? Would you like to start college? Do you want to start volunteering? What inspires you? Try to get involved in activities and surround yourself with positive upbeat people. There are plenty of training opportunities out there for you.

I’m almost certain that once you fill your life with exciting new opportunities with people of the same interests, you will then have a new focus and a chance to enjoy being a 16 year old.

Careers Wales West have experienced staff to help and support young people, make an appointment and see what they can offer you. There are also fun activities and personal development programmes going on at the new ‘Launch Pad’ based at Rathbone.

Careers Wales West, 18 Vaughan Street,Llanelli. Tel (01554) 749213.

The Launch Pad, Rathbone, Station Road, Llanelli. Tel 07824 692565

Good luck and remember you have plenty of time to be a mother.

Gemma