Time2Talk reply Worried Dad

Dear Time2Talk

Hi I am worried about my 10 going on 11 son who will be starting comp in September. I think he has got physiological problems or something.

He is a good lad most of the time but he can fly off the handle so easy and when he does it gets very violent and inflicts pain on his Brother or nearly half kills him by strangling him.

But, soon as you get to him he will walk away from you and just goes very quiet for, well the last time was for three hours. He wouldn’t move, he doesn’t even talk!

Then when he comes out of it it’s as if nothing has happened!

Can you help us please?

Worried Dad

Thank you for your email!

It must be distressing to see your son behaving aggressively. I know that most siblings can argue and fight from time to time, which is normal, but this is clearly becoming a problem.

Have you spoken to your son about his behaviour? Ensure that you choose to speak to him when he is in a calm state of mind. Ask him if there is anything bothering him at school or at home.

It could be something or nothing, but it’s best to find out for sure if there is something that he is not coping with.

I don’t know the full details and I’m not a child psychologist, so I can only give you some possible ideas to think about, and it’s up to you whether you decide to explore them in more detail.

• Have a chat to your GP to get professional advice.
• Speak to his teachers and find out if there have been any incidents at school, or if they have noticed signs of a change in his behaviour. Explain to them what’s happening at home and ask them to keep an eye on him and keep you informed.
• Has your son been the victim of a traumatic experience? If yes, then maybe this is his way of releasing his anger, as a way of coping with his emotions. He may need to have counselling to address this.

There is also a wonderful organisation called ‘Action for Children’. They have trained parenting facilitators, and they may be able to offer you some support on how to manage your son’s behaviour.

Like I’ve mentioned, it could be something or nothing, but do seek help now in case it becomes a bigger problem.

Best of luck, and remember that you are doing your best for your child.

Action for Children/Family and Community Team (FACT).

24 Station Road

Llanelli

Carmarthenshire

SA15 1AN

(01554) 745150

Gemma