Regardless of whether you have lost a loved one a number of times in the past or whether you are experiencing such a tragedy for the very first time, the process of grief is never a smooth or an easy one. It can be particularly jarring, however, if you have never been through it before. As such, here is some helpful guidance to aid you in coping with this taxing process for the first time.
Allow yourself to feel those horrible emotions
The first stage of grief is often denial, and this could mean that you may feel tempted to suppress your negative emotions. You may refuse to allow yourself to feel sad or angry, refuse to cry, or simply attempt to carry on with your life as if nothing has happened. This is unhealthy and is certain to lead to a sudden and overwhelming release of intense emotions a little further down the line. Losing a loved one is a horrendous experience and you are fully entitled to feel every emotion under the sun. The only way that you can begin to heal is to allow those emotions to flow through you and confront them as they emerge.
Understand that everyone deals with grief differently
Unfortunately, there is no guide book for dealing with grief. After all, what works for one person might not work for another. It is a path that only you can walk, and while you will have support along the way, you are responsible for coming out on the other side, learning how to manage the pain, and continuing with your life while holding the memory of your loved one dear.
Talk about it
Simply speaking to a third party about how you are feeling can help you to take tremendous steps towards healing and coping with the pain of a loss. However, it is alright to not feel ready to do that immediately. While talking about the situation is helpful, it is only effective if you are, in fact, ready to do so.
Address obstacles standing in your way of healing
Are there things that you wish you had said to your loved one before they passed away? Are you unhappy about the contents of their last will and testimony? These are both obstacles that can prevent you from healing and completing the grieving process. Sometimes, it can help to write a letter to the deceased. While they obviously won’t get to read it, it will give you the opportunity to get the words out. If you are unhappy about their last will and testimony, there are indeed ways to contest it. Visit the-inheritance-experts.co.uk for more information.
Allow yourself to be vulnerable
Many people will feel the need to be ‘strong’ for their families following the death of a friend or relative. This is doing nobody any favours – yourself included. Now is a time to allow yourself to be vulnerable and to grieve together. Work to support each other rather than trying to be solely responsible for supporting everyone else.
Surrender to the fact that grieving is a process and that it takes time. Eventually, you will be able to create a special place in your heart for your loved one and carry on with your own life. Be patient with yourself, feel all of your emotions, and you will reach this stage a lot sooner than you think.
Help keep news FREE for our readers
Supporting your local community newspaper/online news outlet is crucial now more than ever. If you believe in independent journalism, then consider making a valuable contribution by making a one-time or monthly donation. We operate in rural areas where providing unbiased news can be challenging. Read More About Supporting The West Wales Chronicle